Worthwhile Time

10/25/10

God is gracious.

In the month of September, from the day after I was out of the academy on the 2nd to the day I arrived in Steamboat Springs to see my sister and her family on the 23rd, I went through a lot, mentally, spiritually, physically, and EXTREMELY emotionally. Through all of this time, I began knitting a baby blanket for my only little nephew, Finn. I made the pattern myself. It is my first blanket. I chose very subtle, natural, earthy colors to match the beautiful nature that surrounds their home. It has a lot of sentimental meaning to me because of all the processing I had to go through in that month. The hours went by so slow as I watched the clock and went through each hour in my mind of what I would be doing if I was at the academy. The pain of sitting and making my body recuperate. The continual thoughts of how I was at home…..and all my brothers were at the academy. Every stitch was time passed. The minutes became hours, hours became days, days became weeks. On September 24th the first morning in Steamboat Springs that trip, I gave this very special blanket to my sister for Baby Finn. He loves it! He is such a beautiful sleeping baby!

Time has slipped by quicker this month then last month.

This has been a blessing! I’ve been trying to keep myself occupied with constructive activities.

Started of my fresh month with a beautiful trip to Malibu. My sister was speaking to a MOPS group out there. It was so great to see her, Finn, and Dale. We all went to a delicious restaurant for lunch before they headed to the airport. I had a delicious half cooked tuna sandwich. YUMMM. I was so thankful for the few hours I did get to spend with them.

Another trip to see the boys at the academy was helpful. It is still tough to hear about the things that they are doing. (Live fires, auto extrication, RIC, etc.)

Cadet said, “Your gonna be so lucky cause you won’t have to do ladders in the heat.”

I said, “Um….I don’t know if you remember, but I was right there with you the entire time you were doing ladders. I know EXACTLY what you had to go through.”

Its as if they forgot I was there for half of the academy in a way.

This Saturday is graduation day. October 30. The day that I hoped to be my own graduation. It will be so hard to go and to see my brothers leave without me…never to be with the whole group all together again. But I will practice to be happy for them. THEY did it….and hopefully someday I can too!

I made a dog bed for Foxy to take up some time. I took an old pillow sewed, hand stitched, buttoned, and ruffled it together in 3 days. Such a cute bed for the cost of $2.50. What a steal. I enjoyed going to the fabric store and picking out the fabric and the process of having a project that I intended to complete. After the bed was complete I picked out some pink and white yarn and knit her a blanket.

This little dog is so silly. I often think she is half cat, not only because of her size but because of her obsession with yarn. She loves to sneak into my extra yarn corner of my room, pull it out and unravel the whole skein all over my floor. I have spent plenty of hours trying to re-ball my skeins. I have learned to really hide it so that she cannot get to it now. But on some occasions I will accidentally leave a knitting project out and I will leave the room. As I am around the house, I can hear if she is still in her bed or up and about in my room because her little collar has a certain jingle to it. If I hear this little jingle I will say on the other side of the house, “Excuse me young lady, I hope your not doing what I think your doing.” Then I hear some more jingling. As I quietly walk to my room and peek my head in, there she is having a yarn fest. I can’t help but smile when I see her having so much fun and letting her “cat” side come out. But the reality is, she isn’t suppose to be playing with it. All I have to do to get her to stop is *clear my throat*. Then as soon as she sees me…..the face of guilt is on her face, she lays down and stoops her head to the floor. AWWWWWW. Then in a simple quiet stern voice, “No. You are not suppose to play with that.” Then she apologizes with her eyes and we both move on. She returning to her bed and I returning the yarn to its rightful hidden yarn corner.

If there is anything I try to spoil, it is Foxy. This October marks a year of me having her AND her 2nd birthday! WHOOPEE! She loves her new bed and blanket for her gift. All her toys are pink too. hehe.

I wonder what dogs dream of. Foxy sleeps in her small bed and dreams quite a lot. She makes little dreaming *ruffs* including a little body movement, muffled howls, moving paws, and perked ears. “TOOTIE….what are you dreaming about?”

I have been cooking more with my free time too. I have really learned from my sister the joy of not only having the food TASTE amazing but also LOOK amazing. I was making a fruit salad for dinner and decided that I wanted to make it unique to the eye so I spent extra time on it. I made layers of strawberries, bananas, pomegranates, apples, and honeydew with yogurt in between each. I truly enjoyed making the fruit salad into art. The colors and the layers really made the salad so much more appealing. The simple lesson I learned from making it was that I made the salad beautiful for MYSELF and not to please any other….and it was an even more satisfying feeling then if I had made it for someone else expecting a value from my work. I knew that no matter if I got recognition or not, I LOVED it, was happy with it, and valued by God for making beauty from what He has given me!

Whittier College football games have been a very fun Saturday pass time. As much as I love football, how great is it to watch it in person. I have a family friend who is on the team. So far been to 2 games with my mother and plan to go to at least 1 more with the last 2 of their games in the next 2 weeks. Just from the simple games I have been to, I see the commitment it takes to be on the team. And its a TEAM…if there is ONE great player and the rest are slacking, there is no win. It takes the whole team, the whole family to work together to get a win. It makes each and every person on that team important because without that individual there is a hole….a lack. A complete team that works together and that is on the same page makes all the difference between a win and lose. I can relate with the academy, being on the same page with all the cadets makes all the difference between living and dying. I remember the importance of being sure my training is true and complete so that my “TEAM” can have a perfect “WIN.” God is taking me on this road for a reason….and I need to keep trusting in Him for the strength to keep going on His road even though I do not know the way.

I have done something this month that I have NEVER done before in my life… I, by myself, cleared out all the OLD OLD insulation in the attic of a man that died, who literally NEVER cleaned his house, and smoked for the majority of his life. In order to breathe and still be alive to this day, I needed to look like an alien, hence the goggles, mask, and light. The attic is full of rafters, which was very realistic for firefighting training. It was a core, neck, and back workout. It was an adventure to get into the corners where it was super tight and only crawl on rafters. I would tell myself “Don’t put weight on ANYTHING but the rafters…or you’ll slip through the ceiling and die.”

Day 1 consisted of clearing out half of the insulation with no goggles and no light. Not so great when you can’t see much, thankfully there was a small light up there. All I could see was cleared out for Day 1. These are before and after pictures of day 1.

Day 2 consisted of cleaning out a lot of the missed corners that I couldn’t see before due to light. In this picture I am that bright single light in the far back of the picture.

Here are pictures of before and after of Day 2.

Its truly amazing how filthy I was at the end of each day. All the insulation on my skin was so itchy. This shirt was white and pants normal jean color before. I would have millions of dust particles attached to each hair on my head. But…….I learned a lot about how a roofer, insulation man, and air guys can get away with murder…because how many owners actually are going to climb up into the attic to really check that the job was done right. Sad that their jobs were so sloppy and I had to pick up after each. Make sure a job is done well even if no one sees the job you did. Lessons learned everyday. A total of 35 large bags of insulation were filled into dumpsters, trashcans, and the garage.

I’ve been going hard and strong on my workout and diet plan. It has been hard to find someone to go with that is committed as much as I am and that is willing to spot me. Most of the time I am frustrated because people are getting in my way or being obnoxious and staring. All I want to do is workout. I go to the gym to workout, not to have a chit chat. I thank God for the slight muscles that are working fully and completely strong.

Since the very first day of ladders in the academy, my left knee has been giving me trouble. It never gave me issues before the academy. I took a month off and rested it after I got out. Then felt ready to start up with the weights again. First week was great. Second week it just so slightly hurt 2 times throughout the day….then came Friday morning. Felt fine, just a little sore from the weeks working out. I was walking fine downstairs, then I went back to my room and it just SHOT a sharp pain right through my knee bringing me to tears. I sat there, in frustration and tears waiting for it to go away like it did in the academy. But this one time it was the worst of all. I sat in the same chair for 3 hours straight not moving before it even gave me a chance to move it again. I took Ibuprofen and iced it. It helped a lot, but ever since then…its been pretty sore and not feeling good at all. Talk about God saying, “WAIT.” I feel like I have been waiting…I have been patient. PLEASE let me get my strength back up these next 2 months. PLEASE GOD! I want to be back in the academy in January…today is day 3 of the soreness and the occasional pain reminding me, “Please don’t put your body weight on me right now.”

God I look to you in the next month for strength to put my stubbornness aside and to truly get help.  Guide me to find a good and wise doctor. Continue to break me and show me the ways that I fall short. You are my guide. I will follow.

The journey continues.

Advertisement